8 Comments

  1. Fidel

    This is a great and educative article on sex in relations and marriages. up until reading your article i didn’t know that lack of sex could help ruin a relationship. but I have been educated now. And I guess I agree with you on the points you raised so far.

    • Stefan

      Hi Fidel

      thanks for the comment. I would rather say, a lack of intimacy is dangerous. A lack of sex is just an indicator that so many are overcharged with the high ideals how sex ought to be. So my point is to forget all about what others say and get back to what you feel and want to share with your partner.

      Hang on, STefan

  2. Faith

    This article is great, and unfortunately hits too close to home. Describing it as a vicious circle is exactly right. The lack of intimacy leads to a lack of sex leads to hurt feelings leads to lack of trust leads to lack of intimacy leads to…

    I think your suggestions for breaking out of the circle were spot on as well. Maybe one thing could have been added, and I think that might be forgiveness and on being open to having the intimacy being re-established in the first place. Just a thought.

    Like I said I think this was a really great read, and I will be checking back to see if you have more to say on the subject.

    • Stefan

      Hey Faith

      thanks you so mauch for your personal and thoughtful comment! Especially I appreciate your suggestion to introduce forgivness into the picture. In my mind it’s a very decisive factor because otherwise we remain in resentment and self pity.

      I hope to stay in touch with you, Stefan

  3. Michael Hills

    There is some really good information here. I once read that intimacy, specifically touch, like stroking hair, is more important than Sex in a relationship.

    I think both are important; but after being made aware of this, it does seem that the intimacy of touch is paramount.

    I realized that I can go longer without sex than without intimate touch with my partner. Some say relationships can continue without sex, as long as intimate touch remains. I suppose it depends on the partners, and their ages. What do you think?

    • Stefan

      Hi Michael

      thanks for sharing your view! I very much agree with your emphasis on intimate touch. In an age of perfect sex techniques and performance, the simple gesture of touch makes the difference if backed by according affection. This means that you have to reveal yourself as a person with your emotions and feelings, in other words just with your heart. Taking off the clothes is the metaphor for that.

      As a consequence, sexual unification is one aspect of mutual touch, one melody in a beautiful song! On the other hand, sex or the lack of it can be a cause of deep violations and wounds, because we are dealing here with a very ambivalent side of our existence. Why do you think is it so difficult to combine good sex with intimate touch?

      Cheers, Stefan

  4. Derek Marshall

    Hi there,

    I am all aware, a lack of sex for whatever reason can ruin a relationship, however the lack of sex can be because of lower sex drive and illness like ED. I do state ED is something women suffer also, as if their partner has ED their sex lives are affected. I dedicated my entire site to natural non chemical cure. With some luck, my site will put some smiles back into wives and husbands marriages and faces!

    • Stefan

      Hi Derek

      thanks for your comment, I really appreciate it. Since I don’t know what you mean by ED, could you explain it to me please? So I’ll have a look at your site. Would be great if we could refer each other on the post. Please leave me a message in the mail and I’ll insert your link.

      Cheers, Stefan

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